You Ready?

So it's the last day of June - tomorrow marks one month til the Due Date.

Been to alot of family / summer parties - and everyones favorite question to ask is: You ready? I've got no problem with that in general. It's the way in which certain people say it that irk me. People who don't even have kids - or people who ask it in a way that presumes there is an EXACT way to actually be "ready".

My reply: I'm as ready as I'll ever be. And that is truth - the truest thing I've probably ever said. I'm ready for the challege - our home is physically ready to clean, clothe, house, feed and care for the baby and most importantly (I believe) I'm preparing myself to be unprepared. I know that's just a mindset - and in itself won't make the unexpected easier - but I hope I'll at least be able to stand back in some situations and say 'OK - didn't see that coming - take deep breath'.

Ok - so that's it - T-minus 1 month.

Just Another Day.

Turned 27 two weeks ago. Just another day. So I guess I'm in my late-20's now?
I still say it's the tail end of my mid-20's.
Whatever.
Saw my father and he said "Well - I was 27 when you were born - so you're right on track."
Ha. Nice. That's one way of looking at it. On track.

Still the only one of my friends that is married - let alone having a child. I guess we're 'having kids young' - but a generation ago people wouldn't have seen it that way. It's just been the natural course for us. It's strange because back in the day the longer you stayed single the more 'out-of-ordinary' you were - nowadays I feel like peers look at me cockeyed when I tell them I'm having a kid. Some freeze up and all of the sudden can't find things to talk about with me. Weird. I should say this doesn't happen alot - and not at all with good friends of mine/ours.

Interesting anyway.

Peer To Peer.

Got some tips from an old manager of mine via an iPhone typed message in Facebook. Young guy around 30, single father of a 6 or 7 year old girl. He is a very honest guy - sometimes brutally so - and I thought this was some solid, honest advice worth sharing:

"Anyway, congrats on the baby on the way thing. It is a hard journey but they tell me it eventually pays off. So my best piece of advice, eh? Well in the first months when it's really rough, get rest when you can, be as nice as possible to your wife and be careful of the whole post-pardum(spelling?) thing. As they get older remind yourself of their age cause you will forget when they act like a baby it's because they are. They take a long time to control their emotions. Also, speak to the kid like a person, not like an adult but like a peer, don't use baby talk it just stunts the verbal development. Have fun with it and if you have the ability to play, do so. I'm not good at playing, I'm a talker.
Anyway, do the best you can and make sure you and your wife still get the opportunities to go out and do stuff even after it's born. I think you'll make a great dad and as scared as you are now, it only gets worse as they get older. Sorry, but it's true, unless you can't stand your kid then you won't care. Alright well good luck to you and if you need any other help or advice let me know."

I like the part about not baby talking - I plan to have full blown conversations with my baby as soon as possible - even if the infant can't talk back.

Brutally Honest Barber.

Couldn't let more than a month go by without a post. But I did. Been busy.

Good news - baby is healthy - very healthy - got results back from geneticist - I am not a carrier for the disease that runs in my family - therefore baby is no more at risk than any child would be.

Latest ultrasound on Monday showed ribs, hands, feet, a more normally shaped head (last ultrasound showed a long shrimp/alien type head) - looks like baby's head shape will take after Moms.
The baby is 5 months along - give or take. Old enough to determine gender but we passed. We want a surprise.

Got haircut on Friday - Bulgarian Barber told me not to look at wife's vagina during child birth. And this is a woman we're talking about. She insisted her husband not witness her vagina after hearing from a cousin who is in therapy because he can't look at his wife's vagina that same anymore. Weird. But she also said that I should find out what gender the baby is - so I could settle on a name and when the baby comes out I will already have a bond with it - tried to convince me that otherwise I'd come face to face with a stranger and wouldn't love the baby.

Weird. But funny. That's all I got.

Please someone read my shit blog. Please.

Post-Birth Advice.

Found this snippet. Stumbled upon it while searching other blogs:

Five Way To Outsmart Your 3-Year-Old

Posted Wednesday, February 11, 2009 6:21 AM | By Gretchen Rubin

Every Wednesday is Tip Day.
This Wednesday: Five tips for getting a little kid to take no for an answer.

My 3-year-old hates being told “No” and “Don’t,” and she’s also one of those kids who immediately does exactly what you ask her not to do, so I’ve had to develop some strategies to get the “no” message across without unleashing the very behavior I want to stop. These kinds of minor but extremely aggravating struggles can be a major happiness challenge.

I realized that although she doesn’t want to hear “no,” my daughter responds very well to certain kinds of explanations. While “It’s not healthy,” “We don’t have time,” and “I don’t want to buy that” don’t work very well, other justifications are more effective. Once I've said no, I try to turn her attention to something more interesting. Here are some of the most helpful strategies:

1. “It’s for safety.” For some reason, my daughter wisely accepts safety as an absolute directive, so I invoke it whenever possible. For example, I characterized the “no slamming doors” rule as a safety rule, not a noise/behavior rule. “When people slam doors, eventually, people get their fingers smashed. So for safety, no slamming doors.”

2. “That’s just for decoration.” We can walk into a store crammed with treats or gimcracks, and when she asks if she can get something, I just say sadly, “They’re just for decoration; they’re not for sale.” She never questions this!

3. “The doctor says …” Invoking the authority of a doctor, dentist, teacher, or grandparent often makes a message acceptable. “The Yellow Room teachers say children must wear mittens to schools, not gloves.” “I know you don’t feel like brushing your teeth, but Dr. Smith says it’s very important to brush every night.” I’m not above pretending to send an e-mail to get a particular answer.

4. “I know you know.” My daughter hates being told “Don’t,” and she loves to show that she’s a big girl. So I often say things like, “I know you know this, but other children don’t know that you shouldn’t tap on the glass of a fish tank. They don’t know that the noise bothers the fish. Fortunately for the fish, you already know that.”

5. “The sign says …” Like most children who can’t yet read, my daughter is extremely impressed by the power of the written word. She will obey any sign. And because she can’t read, a sign can say anything that I want it to say.

Looking at the list, I’m struck by how devious and manipulative I sound. Oh well. I’m using my powers for good.

(Whole blog entry can be found here: http://www.slate.com/blogs/blogs/happinessproject/archive/2009/02/11/five-tips-for-getting-a-little-kid-to-take-no-for-an-answer.aspx )

Baby Names, Staking Claims.

I wish everything about this process was as fun as thinking of baby names. It's easy, and fun. Deciding where you want to move, because your current place of residence is to small, is not fun at all.

Lean Green.

Found out today that my job might be next on the chopping block. Been mentally preparing for sometime now but still shocked.
Not receiving any comments or emails for advice so I ask again - what should a soon-to-be-father prepare for most?
If you had very little money to spend in preparation for the baby - what would you have spent it on?
When baby arrives - what's most important to allocate money for?